J O T D

[MaximPhil]

Jotd

Hi TC,
Thanks for loking after us. I vote for continuing the Original JOTD thread.
The occasional duplication is inevitable and i usually laugh at them again anyway I am easly amused
Phil

[slow mo]

hi TC

i,m just trying to pass on some laughs and not really sure of where to post them ,,any help you can give is wanted ,,thanks ,,ride safe slow mo!

[latexeses]

A cop stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed
limit, so he asks the biker his name. 'Fred,' he replies. 'Fred what?' the officer asks.
'Just Fred,' the man responds. The officer is in a good mood and thinks he might just give the biker a break and, write him out a warning instead of a ticket. The officer then presses him for the last name. The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it.
The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. 'Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?' The biker replies, 'It's a long story, so stay with me.' I was
born Fred Johnson. I studied hard and got good grades. When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Johnson, MD. After a while I got bored
being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through School, got my degree, so then I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS.
Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD, so now I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS, with VD. Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS.. Then I was Fred Johnson, MD, with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away
my MD leaving me as Fred Johnson with VD. Then the VD took away my Johnson, so now I am Just Fred.'
He didn't get the ticket...

[TopCatGr58]

Hey Slow Mo,

Did you mean to create NEW THREADS with these posts, or did you want to post them as REPLIES to the established JOTD thread?? I merged them here, and can merge them to the Original Thread if that's what you intended when you hit the NEW THREAD button instead of REPLY!?

That one has gotten rather LARGE, and so I can see creating a new one to provide continuation....I don't know if folks have been reading the old one completely before posting their jokes, so I don't know if there are any or many duplicates in that thread.

So...with a new thread, there's a chance that duplicates that are in the old one may get posted here as new folks join, participate, but might not know or see or read the old one first!?

T.C.

[slow mo]

jotd

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.

Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955." The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."

(Gotta love military time)