Why I hate Succubus

[Incubus]

I know, it is not right to hate an inanimate object. It is especially not right because Succubus is a 1100F, and my original XS11.

The bitch also has been nothing but a problem.

So I was talking to John at MOM this year and he mentioned that others have had problem with bikes configured like Succubus. It has the top end of an XJ1100 (YICS system plugged with set screws) and the cams from the original F motor. Bad idle, rough at low RPM. Absolute scary-ass banshee of a death-dealing widowmaker at anything over 5,000 rpm. To make it run right, he said, I should go back to the original cylinder head.

Well, the original wasn't worth salvaging when I pried it from Succubus' rusty, crusty corpse four years hence. But I have a parts bike with a perfectly good head. I pulled it. It looked great. I installed it.

Tried to pull the number one plug. It snapped.Tried to drill it out. Filled the cylinder with crap, but the base of the plug sat laughing at me. No, I mean literally. That mf'er laughed at me. OK, I've got this Craftsman EZ out. It is huge. Never thought I would ever use it since it seems to be designed for removing broken aircraft carrier driveshafts. One-half inch of the most wicked, hardest metal in the world. I had broken all the smaller EZ outs, but this mother could stand up to a Romulan warbird. I have a nice 7/16 Craftsman open end that fits this EZ Out perfectly....

Before you ask, I know how to post pictures. But there might be children in the room as you read this. At their tender age they should be spared the worldly horrors depicted.

http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p...1/HPIM2916.jpg

That silver in the middle, where there should be a spark plug hole, is some of the most wicked, hardest metal in the world. If you look closely at the edges you can see where I tried pretty much every other tool in my garage looking for something that could mark it, much less pierce it or break it, in an effort to undo what I had wrought.

In a billion years, long after mankind has vanished from this existence, a team of archeologists from some distant world will be digging in what was once my yard. They will find the crumbling remains of what was once an XS11 cylinder head.

"Hey look," the shorter slimier alien will say to the other, "some dumbass broke off one of those giant EZ Outs in a spark plug hole. This race must have been massively strong, as our tests indicate that EZ Out is made of some of the most wicked, hardest metal we have encountered anywhere in the universe. I bet the individual of whatever species this was hated this machine."

I picked the wrong lifetime to give up drinking.

So does anyone have a cylinder head they can let go for shipping?

Patrick

[crazy steve]

(In the voice of Foghorn Leghorn, the cartoon rooster..)

'Son, I say son, you just don't know your own strength...'

[redbone]

that's a funny write up! while i don't have a spare cylinder head, just wondering if you could post a pix of the busted knuckles that went along with it.

[fredintoon]

http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p...1/HPIM2916.jpg

Hi Patrick,
you have done very well, it's not just anyone who can graft a constipated cat's arsehole into an XS11 cylinder head.
And a beautiful write-up about it too.
Kudos.
What you need now is a "bro with EDM"
That's Electrical Discharge Machine.
The ol' Sparkatron loves to eat hard stuff, the harder the better, so long as it conducts electricity. With the proper electrode an EDM can even follow the original spark plug thread to clean it out but I suspect your thread is hooped and you'd need a thread salvage job once the hole was clear.
Or you could look for another cylinder head.

[Incubus]

Actually, Fred, I think the thread is probably fine - except for the part where it has a spark plug melded to it. I haven't actually seen the thread, and none of my efforts have managed to penetrate the plug remnants, slo the condition of the thread should not have changed.

If I coulda got that sucker to move I believe I could screw another plug in. But it's Zen is strong. When it became one with everything, everything became as one.

Wow, that's deep. My head hurts. Is it suppose to hurt when you use it?

In the past I have had some moderate success utilizing alternative mechanical methods. Prayer, mostly, but there is some chanting and one very unhappy doomed chicken. A nun, once, but that was desperation. I do not think Succubus would respond to such treatment.

The bitch is evil. I need strippers and booze.

And that's just for me. The bike will require stronger mojo......


Patrick

[jwhughes3]

pound it out

turn the head over and punch it through - stripping the plug threads but those can be fixed.


John

[fredintoon]

Actually, Fred, I think the thread is probably fine - except for the part where it has a spark plug melded to it. I haven't actually seen the thread, and none of my efforts have managed to penetrate the plug remnants, slo the condition of the thread should not have changed. - - - The bitch is evil. - - -

No Patrick,
the bitch is merely being stubborn and a real man should relish the challenge.
I'm with John here. Turn the bitch over and go at her from the other end.
IOW, remove the head so you can get at the inner end of whatever remains of the plug. Use a round punch (in an air-hammer is best but an ordinary hammer will work too)
to smash out whatever remains of the plug's centre electrode and ceramic core. This should also remove the shards of the Easy-out.
Now all that's left to remove is the plug's outer steel shell.
For this you will need a drill press and whatever you can rig up to keep the plug hole directly vertical and in line with the drill. Chuck a drill bit just a tad bigger than the hole in the plug body and drill it through. Hopefully the plug body will catch on the drill bit and thread itself out.
If not, go one size up and try again. Repeat as req'd. If all else fails, use the special drill bit that comes with a 14mm Helicoil kit then Helicoil the hole.

[Incubus]

Before I try anything so exotic, Fred, first I am going to search the internet for the correct harmonic frequency to shatter the obsidian-like material jammed into that hole. If I can get it to implode, I am hoping the shock of the unblast will be enough to suck the spark plug inward, perhaps even miniaturized, letting it fall harmlessly into the cylinder. With all the other stuff. Like that little drill bit. Oops.

And, sadly, essentially all of the ceramic material from the plug. I was quite efficient in gutting the beast so that the EZ Out could get a good grip. I didn't think breakage was an option. I am searching for places in the world that can most benefit from my newfound - and again dormant, I fear - super strength. Believe me, it is in there good, and complicates all scenarios.

I do have to tell you, though, I can appreciate your sexual imagery about the XS11. I believe you speak from the heart and, seemingly, memory.....

Patrick

[mack]

Head

I enjoyed your thread emmensely. If you pull the head and get it in an oven when the wife isn't around perhaps you might get the threads to crack a bit from the inside and it may let go enough to get that dude out of there.

[Ken Talbot]

Now that's just plain nasty. How about using a thin 1 inch diameter diamond disc in a Dremel tool to slot the end of the stuck ez-out wide enough and deep enough for the straight bit from your impact driver set? Get the bit snug into the slot, set the impact driver to the appropriate direction, and give it a mighty whack. Unless the impact driver bit is even harder than the ez-out, the worst that should happen is you break the end off the driver bit...

[CaptonZap]

One thing I don't remember reading in your post was that, when the chicken was "sacrificed", that there was a ritual fire involved. If not, that could be part of your problem.
Try taking another chicken, or, my personal favorite, pigeon, and after the ritual fire is stoked well, put the head (engine, not pigeon) over the glowing embers, leaving it there until some of the pigeon fat starts to smoke. (I for got to mention smearing pigeon fat on the head). That is around 400 deg's Far. Put some PB Blaster, Kroil, or, my favorite, Acetone ATF mix, or mystical unguent of your choice, into the exposed portion of the threads as the head cools.
After a spell of incantations, (make sure the kids are out of ear shot), repeat the heating episode and unguent application. Let set over night. Go in and enjoy squab breast for your dinner.
Tomorrow, the stars will be aligned differently than today.
And then would be a good time to once again build the sacred fire, put on some heavy, well insulated un-holy gloves, and, after the head is hotter than the hubs of hell, try to unscrew the remainder of the shell, using any of the methods described in the previous posts. (This will require pre ceremonial preparation of the demon ezeout).
The hoped for outcome is that the aluminum devils locked inside the head will, with the heat, feel more at home, and become expansive, releasing their corrosive grip on the shell, and allow you to remove it. You might mention to the head that, if it will ALLOW you, (supplication is better than threats in mystical situations), to remove the old shell, you will in return, install a brand new, well plated plug in it's stead.

Or you could go buy a good used head, since it looks like the plug gasket portion of that one is pretty well FUBARed.
CZ

[CaptonZap]

p.s.
I forgot one other little part of the rite; after the head is hot, if some cool sacrimental fluid is dribbled down the center hole of what is left of the plug shell, the demons, not wishing to get their fingers cold, may relax their grip even more than usual. FWIW CZ

[ViperRon]

Nothing left to loose

I personally have never done what I am suggesting with a cylinder head before but did do it with a large pully on the end of a large Hydrolic motor. A cutting tourch in the direct center will get the metal cherry hot quick. another person on the otherside with a can of canned air spraying the plug with the can upside down will cool the metal quick. Then using a spray like PB Rust Buster may after a couple of attempts penetrate loosening the plug. I did this three times and was able to get the tap I had broke out. The issue is different metals heat and cool to different expansion levels and this quick heat and then freeze most times breaks things that can not be broken by massive force.

[natemoen]

I have a head at home that I got for the valves. It had a couple fins broken off on one side and has no valves anymore. You can have it for shipping, and would have to put your valves and cams and whatnot in it.

I am away from home till monday and then I can give it a good lookover and see if there is anything obviously wrong with it that would make it a bad candiate. Let me know.

[New2Me]

I'm goin to vote for the air hammer.

Last summer I rebuilt the suspension on my car and got stuck at the tie-rod ends. I started with good ole PB Blaster, then some freeze spray but with no luck. Then I broke out the torch and a bottle of water thinking I was going to show it who's the boss but it also laughed at me. Finally while hanging my head in defeat, my air hammer sparkled in my eye. About 15 sec. of revenge later the prick just spun off like the past 2 days never happened.