the bathtub.

[scoobes]

The Bathtub

It doesn't hurt to take a hard look at yourself from time to time, and
this should help get you started.

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what
the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be
institutionalized.
"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a
teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty
the bathtub."

"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the
bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup."

"No." said the Director, "A normal person would just pull the plug."

Do you want a room with or without a view?

[Jerry]

A man was driving down a country road when a tire fell off his car due to loose lug nuts. Looking up he saw a tall fence running along the road. On it was a sign, Garfield County Mental Hospital.

He was looking at his car when he heard a voice, and turning around, saw a man behind the fence.

The driver said "I don't know what to do now. I need to get into town to have this fixed."

The man behind the fence said "Take one lug nut off your other three tires and use it to put on your spare. That will get you to town."

The driver did just that. Turning to the man behind the fence he asked "What are you in there for? That was a pretty good solution."

The man behind the fence answered, "Look, I'm crazy, not stupid."

Have a good day.

[pathfinder]

Gone Fishing

A hillbilly was stopped by a game warden in North Carolina recently with two ice chests of fish. He was leaving a cove well known for its fishing.

The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"

"Naw, sir, I ain't got none of them there licenses, no. You must
understand these here are my pet fish."

"Pet fish?" said the game warden.

"Ya. Every night I take these here fish down to da lake and let them swim 'round for a while. Then I whistle and they jump rat back into this here ice chest and I take them home."

"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!" says the warden.
The hillbilly looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, "It's the truth Mr. Government man, I'll show you. It really works."

"Okay," said the game warden, "I've GOT to see this!"
The hillbilly poured the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
After several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said, "W! ell?"

"Well, what?" said the hillbilly.

The warden said, "When are you going to call them back?"

The hillbilly said, "Call who back?"

"The FISH!" replied the warden.

"What fish?" answered the hillbilly.
We Hillbillies may not be as smart as some city slickers, but we aren't as dumb as some government employees.