alzheimer's and the elderly! (this includes you!)

[ross]

hey there folks....this is not a personal sob story about how life has dealt me a raw deal....this is about the elderly and how ther are cared for by the country you support and by the money that is being taken out of your check every week....trust me over the past 3 days my eyes have been opened and the crap that is coming our way and it is not good!....i know that some of the forum members know what i am talking about and probably are going thru it at this moment, if they haven't already......(trust me this is not a age-discrimination blog!)......

my parents are in their 80's and have been married 60+ years....my mother has been diagnosed with alzheimer's....my father is a little hard of hearing, but other than that in fairly good health (he still drives)....they live on a fixed income (who doesn't nowadays!)...but they do have other funds that suppliment when times get tight...(not much, but enough!).....they own their own house & vehicle.......my mother had regressed back to a time of when she was about 8-10 years old...she thinks both her parents and her grandmother are alive and the home she grew up in (that was torn down 15 years ago!) is right down the street...(the property is 1/2 mile down the road from where they live...but is now populated by 250+ house subdivision!).....every single minute is re-lived over and over again through out the day by asking questions about when mom and dad are coming over and when she is going to be able to go home....(in her own living room!)....finally, there is only my brother, SWMBO, and i to cover things....

anywho, back to the point....thursday morning dad started throwing up blood....(to the hospital with him!)....SWMBO stayed with mom during the day while i was at work...got off work early to help her out....wound up spending the night watching mom...(she wound up staying up 28 hours!).....called into work thursday night and told them that i could not make it in for friday (they totally understood!).....brother relieved us on friday during the day for a few hours.....took over friday night and watched her until this morning....brother showed up this morning and we hung all together until this afternoon....brother is watching her tonight while we get a chance to spend a night at home....(i am on call at this moment!)..dad is supposed to come home tomorrow sometime (hopefully!).....(yea family planning and timing had a lot to do with us making this happen!!)

needless to say, researching the subject online and living the experience has opened our eyes.....alzheimer's is a disease that takes prisoners!....of their own mind.....i would not wish this disease upon my worse enemy (or even my ex-wife!).....(nor even the errant harley owner!)......and the help, your government that has taken your money since the day that you started working, is minimal at best!....in fact it is pitiful once you look into it.....take our money and give us the least you can seem's to be the practice!!.....go figure.....medicare makes you jump through hoops just to qualify and crawls up your a** for the previous 5 years to make sure you are not hiding any monies!!!.....also learned that, basically in our situation we might have to "lie" to the hospital folks just to get her admitted into the hospital and have a chance of getting medicare to finance her staying in a nursing home......without a "spend down period"......(spend down meaning that you will have to pay $4000-$6000 per month until you are broke then you "qualify for coverage!).....and even then, if you follow all the rules, the "spouse in the community" only gets to keep have of the life savings they have accumlated!...

people....we are NOT sheep.....we do NOT follow the shepard....this country is made of free minds that got us where we are......our elderly do not deserve to be treated this way.......i think that our government owes us more than they know....we have paid into a fund that supports our elders and now (due to the overspending of our idiots in Washington!).....our parents (and now us!)....will feel the pressure that is happening in our family circle now.....voice your opinion on this topic....ride hard, ride safe....ross

[bikerphil]

I feel for ya bro, my Grandpa had Alzheimer's and it did take a toll on our family making everyone miserable. He'd wander away from home and get lost, the cops eventually would pick him up a couple miles away and bring him back. He was a painter all his life and I think the constant fumes contributed to his condition. I think they have some medications these days that might help your mom some.

[crazy steve]

.....and the help, your government that has taken your money since the day that you started working, is minimal at best!....in fact it is pitiful once you look into it.....take our money and give us the least you can seem's to be the practice!!.....go figure.....medicare makes you jump through hoops just to qualify and crawls up your a** for the previous 5 years to make sure you are not hiding any monies!!!.....also learned that, basically in our situation we might have to "lie" to the hospital folks just to get her admitted into the hospital and have a chance of getting medicare to finance her staying in a nursing home......without a "spend down period"......(spend down meaning that you will have to pay $4000-$6000 per month until you are broke then you "qualify for coverage!).....and even then, if you follow all the rules, the "spouse in the community" only gets to keep have of the life savings they have accumlated!...

Ross, after having gone through this with my mother (my father 'fortunately' was already gone), my heart goes out to you. And how the nursing homes strip the elderly of every penny they can is criminal (and what makes it even worse, is there's regulations that prevents you from doing much about it). But there are things you can do to help a little; find and talk to a competent attorney who specialises in 'elder law'. I did, and the thieving bastards didn't get it all. The other thing is avoid 'chain' nursing homes like the plague. Try to find a owner/operator or at least a locally owned one that has been around a while. These usually survive on reputation and have a stable staff; the multihome outfits are mostly just human warehouses and the buck is king. And if it smells bad when you walk in, turn and walk out. These are lessons I learned the hard way, and I hope this helps...

'78E original owner