Asian riding instructions

[rockjok]

I ran across this on another list and thought it was worth "repeating".

Taken from a 1962 Honda Motor Cycle Instruction Book. Translated by Honda for
the American Motorcycle Rider:1. At the rise of the hand by Policeman, stop
rapidly. Do not pass him by or otherwise disrespect him.2. When a passenger of
the foot, hooves in sight, tootel the horn trumpet melodiously at first. If he
still obstacles your passage, tootel him with vigor and express by word of
mouth, warning Hi, Hi.3. Beware of the wandering horse that he shall not take
fright as you pass him. Do not explode the exhaust box at him. Go soothingly
by.4. Give big space to the festive dog that makes sport in roadway. Avoid
entanglement of dog with wheel spokes.5. Go soothingly on the grease mud, as
there lurks the skid demon. Press the brake foot as you roll around the corners,
and save the collapse and tie up.Now everybody go out and "tootel the horn
trumpet melodiously" at the day!! And always beware of the "skid demon"!!

[prometheus578]

Truer words were never spoken.

[Ivan]

Sounds like some of the old Husqvarna chainsaw instructions that said:

"Do not try to stop the chain with your hands or genitals"

[xsilerating]

Sounds like some of the old Husqvarna chainsaw instructions that said:

"Do not try to stop the chain with your hands or genitals"

Especially your hands !

[fredintoon]

Hi Guys,
what I reckon is, don't mock a foreigner's attempt to communicate in English
unless you can do so in their own language.

[DGXSER]

In that vein but more of a side note Fred, do you speak French Canadian? I understand it is almost a language of its own.

Hard to complain about how others communicate when here in the good ole USA we sometimes can't agree on how to speak english. The same words spoken in different states can get you in big trouble in one and find favor in another.

[prometheus578]

No sympathy.

Well Fred...
I wouldn't mock someone's attempts at communication, be they oral or verbal, because they're tryin'.
On the other hand... something official-like... put out by a big corporation... I would expect them to do a little more research into the message that they're trying to get across.
I mean... if I was a business dealing in a foreign market, I'd make sure my verbage was proper.
Geez, even an ad or publicity man can walk outside his office, stop an American tourist and say, "Hey pal.. read this and tell me if'in it makes sense.

[Geezer]

I wish I hadn't sold the Honda P50a repair manual I used to have. It had some of the most humorous descriptions of repair procedures and the picture of a torque wrench with a Crescent wrench head was worth the price alone.

Geezer

[xs11lover]

That's really funny, at times i think the same guy did the workshop manual!

[fredintoon]

"seperated by a common language"

In that vein but more of a side note Fred, do you speak French Canadian? I understand it is almost a language of its own.

>
Hi Don,
I don't speak French Canadian although I married one. And it's worse than that.
There are several versions of spoken French in Canada and those raised in different regions have to speak slowly and enunciate plainly to understand each other. Written down is fine though, it all reads the same.
According to the French, the Canadian version of the language is oddly old-fashioned.
According to the Quebec Language Police the French spoken in France is so contaminated by English loan words that they could be fined for it.
(And yes, there IS such a police force.)

[cloerts]

On the other hand... something official-like... put out by a big corporation... I would expect them to do a little more research into the message that they're trying to get across.

I lived in Mexico City for a couple of years, and the 'GOT MILK?' people put up billboards with celebraties sporting milk mustaches like they did here. Only problem was the literal translation "TIENES LECHE?" reads in spanish as "ARE YOU LACTATING?" Not so good for the old PR image.

[SG-Olli]

Well Fred...
I wouldn't mock someone's attempts at communication, be they oral or verbal, because they're tryin'.
On the other hand... something official-like... put out by a big corporation... I would expect them to do a little more research into the message that they're trying to get across.
I mean... if I was a business dealing in a foreign market, I'd make sure my verbage was proper.
Geez, even an ad or publicity man can walk outside his office, stop an American tourist and say, "Hey pal.. read this and tell me if'in it makes sense.

Well said (or written). I always wonder why normal people like you and me think that straight, but the BIG GUYS in the suits don't seem to get it.

Ford Motor Co. has an asembly plant somewhere in South America, I think it is Brasil.
They had a contract with the government there about all the regulations and agreements with regards to that plant.
When it was all finished Ford sent all the parts down there, the workers started to build vehicles and Ford wanted to export them to the States.
But the brasil government refused to let the vehicles go.
The reason: The contract was not valid because all contracts with the brasil government had to be in portogese not in english.
It took a while and some money to get that straight.

Another example: I'm working in a company building manual transmissions for Ford here in Europe. Our suppliers are all over Europe, from Israel over Turkey, Italy, France Hungary and so on.
Our contracts are all in english, as most of the people are at least understanding that. But although those contracts are legally binding, we do not have anybody who is firm in legal english. Sometimes those contracts are pretty strange, just like the japanese instructions.

[DGXSER]

The NOVA???

Anyone remember that one. Chevrolet sent it down to Mexico and did not change the name. Any of our Spanish/Mexican fluent members that can clarify what NOVA means?

This is not in my mind making fun, as much as just noting a corporate faux pas.

[CatatonicBug]

Anyone remember that one. Chevrolet sent it down to Mexico and did not change the name. Any of our Spanish/Mexican fluent members that can clarify what NOVA means?

This is not in my mind making fun, as much as just noting a corporate faux pas.

Sorry, that one is actually not true. Snopes confirms that here. As Kermit the Frog once said, "Somebody thoughtta that, and someone believed it..."