"Hey you... yeah you, Lard Ass!"

[xsilerating]

I haven't been around lately myself and it was a shock to see Prom injoying hisself. So I called the hospital and got this info from the charge nurse. She says that when Prom was admitted the attending nurse was about as ugly as a mud fence. Now when the shift change came around, she told the dayshift nurse, a really good looker, that Prom had this tatoo on his willy that said SHORT. Well the next day the cuttie told the butt ugly nurse that she was wrong, the tatoo said "SHORTY'S BAR AND GRILL. ALBUQUERQUE NEW MEXICO." You know I think he's going to be OK now.

Oh, oh... now you've really got him dreaming (in Technicolour ) . Poor fella... may not ever return to reality after that!

[xs11jack]

I haven't been around lately myself and it was a shock to see Prom injoying hisself. So I called the hospital and got this info from the charge nurse. She says that when Prom was admitted the attending nurse was about as ugly as a mud fence. Now when the shift change came around, she told the dayshift nurse, a really good looker, that Prom had this tatoo on his willy that said SHORT. Well the next day the cuttie told the butt ugly nurse that she was wrong, the tatoo said "SHORTY'S BAR AND GRILL. ALBUQUERQUE NEW MEXICO." You know I think he's going to be OK now.

[fredintoon]

Let me see if i got this right: if you weigh 300 lbs and have a 4" willy, and you loose 100 lbs and have a 5 " willy,. does that mean that if you weigh 120 lbs ( like me ) I would have a 7" willy? - - -

Hi Ed,
sorry, no. Or at least, your willy may be a 7 incher, I dunno. Perhaps if you measured it from it's tip to your dump chute? Whatever, your willy is the length God made it and it can't be made any longer.
What we are discussing is the portion of it that sticks out beyond your gut.
That will increase if your gut shrinks and thus more of it will be available for deployment in it's genetic transfer mode which in turn will make you more popular with the ladies.
However, if you weigh 120 lbs and starved 2Pi inches off your waistline you'd most likely be dead in which case your willy's genetic transfer mode could not happen.

[DGXSER]

Wow, now I saw the connection of weight lose to the heart health. But other than the uhhh....exercise being aluded to testing your heart.

[Special Ed]

Let me see if i got this right: if you weigh 300 lbs and have a 4" willy, and you loose 100 lbs and have a 5 " willy,. does that mean that if you weigh 120 lbs ( like me ) I would have a 7" willy? Yes SWMBO has measured, but I won't report.
Have heard that the size of a a bikers gonads are inversly proportional to the size of the rear tyre of his bike , or the volume of his bikes exoust! And f***k the spelling. I'm drunk.
Special Ed

[fredintoon]

Motivation

Hi list,
this string has segued from heart attacks into weight loss.
You know those e-mails that sneak through the best of spam filters and offer you a magic nostrum that'll make your wang grow longer?
They have no medical or scientific validity but here is mine that does work and it's yours for free!
Lose 2 Pi inches from around your waistline. Your wang will not really grow longer but there will be another inch of it available for deployment.
If this thought don't motivate you nothing will.

[kjohnson]

Ok, after "researching" BMI a little more (never looked into it as I had no use for a system that puts my dad as overweight when he has to run around in the shower to get wet and couldn't gain weight if his life depended on it) and I only fall into the obese category. Morbidly obese is 2 steps up yet. Makes me feel a little better. Maybe my doc was trying to scare me into loosing weight?

[kjohnson]

The key word in what you said earlier was "morbidly" obese, as in Morbidity, a term we in the health field use for talking about DEATH statistics!
T.C.

the strange thing is, 10 years ago a person at the same height/weight as me was only considered overwieght. needed another 50-100lb to make them morbidly obese

[fredintoon]

Got another sleep study with the CPAP on March 13th to see if it will work for me. It seems to take a heck of a lot longer to get anything done medically in Alberta since we started to "boom" and everyone and their dog moved here. It took me 6 months to get the first sleep study in the first place. I miss being able to phone my doctor on a Tuesday for an appointment the next day. Now I'm lucky to get in within the next month.

Hi Kevin,
lucky you! in Saskatchewan it's at least a 2-year waiting list for a sleep study.
And lucky me, It only took a week after a routine check-up to get sent home with a computer and an oxygen uptake monitor to record how well I did overnight.
(It seems I didn't quite need a CPAP machine)
But that quick, easy and low cost program has since been abandoned by the geniuses who run Sask Health and I hope they choke in their sleep.

[TopCatGr58]

It's not just a lot of hot air!

TC I dont completely agree on what you term as anaerobic respiriation. My understanding is that exercise that is Anaerobic in nature means physiologically that amount of muscular exertion can be accomplished without the maximum uptake of O2 that is incurred under Aerobic conditions. It is always Anaerobic that goes first. A good example of an anaerobic exercise would be an athlete who is say a 100 yard dash sprinter.He does not go into Aerobic respiration until he has finished the sprint and O2 debt has caught up with him.
A marathon runner is an example of Aerobic exercise where O2 debt has long occurred and your heart and lungs must maintin homeostatsis at the elevated levels you are running at...in otherwords you try to acclimate to a steady state condition between exercise and heart and respiration but that is soley aerobic in nature. BTW You are correct that lactic acid is the biproduct of muscular exertion. We get sore because the muscles lose their elasticity due to lactic acid build up...Stretching exercises alleveiate the lack of elasticity and help breakdown the lactic acid...thus alleviating those aches.

Hey BNE,

I haven't studied all of the finer details of human metabolism, the Krepps cycle, etc., like my wife the nurse had to, but what I'm saying is that AEROBIC exercise is what a person does ie. running, swimming, etc. which causes the heart rate to accelerate to around 120-140 bpm, about twice the resting state. When a person is properly conditioned, then while they are performing this exercise, they are able to intake the needed amount of oxygen, AND are able to circulate it to the muscles doing the exertion in quantities adequate to MAINTAIN proper metabolic processes....Aerobic respiration. And as long as the muscles are getting adequate OXYGEN they will metabolize the sugars and such and don't create lactic acids. BUT if a person is not in shape/conditioned, and is not able to supply the muscles with the required oxygen, then the metabolic processes change the type of chemical reaction that is occuring in the mucles so that it can still generate the required energy to keep working, but the byproduct of this lack of oxygen metabolism=anaerobic respiration is the lactic acids, and they accumulate within the muscle tissues, etc.!

So..like you said, as long as the person is able to have a homeostasis with the oxygen intake and the demands for it by the muscles, then they are performing AEROBICly, but if they increase their activity beyond the ability to supply the required oxygen, then the muscles will convert to performing ANAEROBICly, and that's when they get lactic acid build up, soreness, etc..

So...Kevin, I don't doubt that TaiChi is a decent exercise, but is it stimulating your heart enough to EXERCISE it? Yeah, ya gotta motivate yourself, as well EDUCATE your SWMBO regarding her caloric intake, she just needs to eat a healthy diet, not for 2! Back in the late 50's my mother was put on a DIET, not allowed to gain more than 20 lbs, I still came out at 22" and ~7 lbs.

The key word in what you said earlier was "morbidly" obese, as in Morbidity, a term we in the health field use for talking about DEATH statistics!
T.C.

[kjohnson]

Got another sleep study with the CPAP on March 13th to see if it will work for me. It seems to take a heck of a lot longer to get anything done medically in Alberta since we started to "boom" and everyone and their dog moved here. It took me 6 months to get the first sleep study in the first place. I miss being able to phone my doctor on a Tuesday for an appointment the next day. Now I'm lucky to get in within the next month.

[fredintoon]

- - - My big problem is motivation. I have very little. My wife who sat me down to proclaim that she is sick of being fat is no motivation to me as all she still does is overeat and sleep. Just because she is pregnant and "eating for two" she thinks she needs to eat like two. Most of my family seems to have little interest in motivating me and the only friend I have that is close to me make me look like an Ethiopian.
I just don't know how to find time in the day to do all that I want to do, exercise, work, eat and sleep.

Hi Kev,
Three things to do:-
1) Chuck out all the fatty food in the house and put your wife and yourself on a low fat high fibre reduced calorie food regime as you do aerobic exercises together.
2) Raise hell with your doctor about fast tracking you a CPAP machine.
3) Hmm, what was 3? Oh yeah, cut back on the self-pity.

[madmax-im]

Don't get me wrong, I a m trying. That is what the 4-6 hour of Taichi a week it for. I don't have the room to do more Taichi at home and it is dangerous for a newb to do it on snow/ice. I can do the Taichi foundation exercises, but they aren't quite as good a workout. I also take my hyperactive puppy outside to play and run/walk.

My big problem is motivation. I have very little. My wife who sat me down to proclaim that she is sick of being fat is no motivation to me as all she still does is overeat and sleep. Just because she is pregnant and "eating for two" she thinks she needs to eat like two. Most of my family seems to have little interest in motivating me and the only friend I have that is close to me make me look like an Ethiopian.

I just don't know how to find time in the day to do all that I want to do, exercise, work, eat and sleep.

Kevin I am sorry to hear that your family is lacking in support and motivation for you. Ultimately it comes down to yourself as most everything does. You have to motivate yourself...but take exercise with the frame of mind as being recreational...not as some dreaded physical activity for which you have little motivation...Personally my favorite activity is on my bicycle a Mtn bike I ride around in a huge park...Its agood aerobic activity that will burn lots of weight off and gives you a chance to get outdoors and moving in the world. Its easier than running as there is no punishing or pounding of your body against gravity...
First off get your sleeping issues straightened out...then and only then should you embark on a physical regimine. At that point you will need to build your strentgh and endurance. To do so you have to establish certain levels of exercise. You must know your limits and know at what point you need to progress to the next level.
I used to be a marathon runner back in the 70's but mostly recreationally not competitively and also I was a Phys Ed major 3 years before I switched to Rehabilitation...
So I would encourage you to FIND some time as with anything if you cant find the time then you wont get very far. YOU hold the keys... not your wife or anyone else You can do it if deep down in your soul that is truly what you want. I believe you can! You need to as well. Taichi is a very good idea and is meditative. Mental discipline and spirituality and OFC being a physical discipline as well.
The key to good health is threefold...diet ,exercise and a positive mental/spiritual attitude.
I hope I am not sounding like a preacher but these are my experiences and I am hoping you could benefit from some of it.

[Big Daddy Funk]

My 2 1/2 cents CDN

As always, Kevin, there is lots of experience and good advice on this site. My story is I was in the best shape of my life at 49. SWMBO had complained for years about my snoring and interupted breathing while I was asleep. My Doctor made an appointment at a sleep clinic and the waiting list was 6 months. While waiting for the appointment I had two coronaries and stints installed. As it turned out I did need the machine, and have used it ever since(even napping).
My best advice is do what you need to do to get the machine if you need it. It can only help you.
Walking is stongly advocated by physicians and patients alike. Start out with short walks that you are comfortable with and lengthen them as you are able. I found right after supper before the tiredness sets in works best for me. Take your dog with you and keep the routine. Your dog will learn the pattern and encourage you to keep the routine.
Lastly, Try to maintain a positive atittude. Easier said than done I know but a little success goes a long way. Good Luck, Rick

[kjohnson]

Don't get me wrong, I a m trying. That is what the 4-6 hour of Taichi a week it for. I don't have the room to do more Taichi at home and it is dangerous for a newb to do it on snow/ice. I can do the Taichi foundation exercises, but they aren't quite as good a workout. I also take my hyperactive puppy outside to play and run/walk.

My big problem is motivation. I have very little. My wife who sat me down to proclaim that she is sick of being fat is no motivation to me as all she still does is overeat and sleep. Just because she is pregnant and "eating for two" she thinks she needs to eat like two. Most of my family seems to have little interest in motivating me and the only friend I have that is close to me make me look like an Ethiopian.

I just don't know how to find time in the day to do all that I want to do, exercise, work, eat and sleep.