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My wife bought me a Harley for Easter.

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  • My wife bought me a Harley for Easter.

    Actually, it's a replica. A 310 gram hollow casting of pure milk chocolate. It's just waiting to clog up my arteries as it fattens me out of my jeans. It sickens me just to see it there in it's transparent-fronted cardboard box saying "eat me!"
    Fred Hill, S'toon
    XS11SG with Spirit of America sidecar
    "The Flying Pumpkin"

  • #2
    The whole Harley image industry is "hollow cast" if you ask me, Fred.
    Appealing on the outside, but nothing of substance on the inside.
    "Damn it Jim, I'm a doctor, not a mechanic!' ('Bones' McCoy)

    Comment


    • #3
      Know the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?

      A Hoover can only hold ONE dirtbag....

      I've been to the plant down in York a few times...not really impressive or anything. I'd have been much happier to tour the garage of Gus, the hermit XS rebuilder.

      I dont see the obsession with Harleys today. I could understand back in the days of Easy Rider, but now? Just dont make no sense.

      I mean, if you want to ride an American classic just for the sake of riding an American classic, find some old lady and take her home! But if you want durability, dependability, and hours of riding fun without having to bust knuckles every ten miles, then you gotta go ricer. I say this being a Harley fan since boyhood. One summer on my XS and Im a convert.
      "Rat Rod"
      79 XS1100 Standard
      87 VMAX cans
      Cheap Japanese Tires
      Cobalt Blue Rattle Can Paint
      Custom Lighting on a Budget

      Perry Center Fire Department
      Perry Emergency Ambulance

      "If we don't do it, who will?"


      Some people have one of those days, I have one of those lives...

      Comment


      • #4
        What do Harley's and dogs have in common?

        They both like to ride in the back of trucks!.............

        What is considered the ultimate Harley accessory?

        A matching trailer to haul it in!.....
        Jim Horton
        Myrtle Beach SC 29588
        843-274-5045

        Comment


        • #5
          I mean, if you want to ride an American classic ... ...find some old lady and take her home!
          Never heard that before... and wish that I hadn't now!

          No, that was quite good!
          Harley's are like Hummers... imagined status symbols.
          Two things you'll never see....
          A Hummer driven off-road or a Harley driven for pleasure.
          Hmmm... a difference perhaps...
          Hummer drivers always drive with their eyes straight ahead... they can't be bothered to look at "the little people".
          Harley riders constantly swivvel their heads around... having to reassure themselves that everyone else is looking at them.
          Isn't that why they always rev their engines at stop lights?
          Dual purpose?
          Draw attention to themselves and keep the engine from dying at the same time.
          (I think that's a tip from the owner's manual)
          "Damn it Jim, I'm a doctor, not a mechanic!' ('Bones' McCoy)

          Comment


          • #6
            Harleys & Hummers

            Hi Prom,
            I have never operated either. But let's assume that I'd won either or both in a lottery along with enough money that I wasn't forced to sell them to pay off my mortgage & credit cards.
            Would I then ride the Harley for pleasure & drive the Hummer off-road?
            Too effin' right I would and I'd bet you would too. And walk away whistling if they broke down or got stuck. They only cost the price of a lottery ticket, right?
            Fred Hill, S'toon
            XS11SG with Spirit of America sidecar
            "The Flying Pumpkin"

            Comment


            • #7
              What to take home

              " if you want to ride an American classic just for the sake of riding an American classic, find some old lady and take her home! But if you want durability, dependability, and hours of riding fun - - "

              Hi Hammerhead,
              if you didn't get durability, dependability and hours of riding fun you took the wrong old lady home.
              Fred Hill, S'toon
              XS11SG with Spirit of America sidecar
              "The Flying Pumpkin"

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by JACKHAMMER01
                What do Harley's and dogs have in common?

                They both like to ride in the back of trucks!.............

                What is considered the ultimate Harley accessory?

                A matching trailer to haul it in!.....
                lol, I'm glad the Hammer is back.
                79 XS11 special

                Comment


                • #9
                  Given the choice, I'd rather have 4 cylinders firing smoothly than 2 cylinders popping off with that whomp-whomp sound. I get better take-off and smoother cruising.

                  I love my XS...my neighbors do, too. If I had a loud obnoxious 2-cylinder popper I'm sure they'd appreciate my lust for riding a lot less.
                  "Rat Rod"
                  79 XS1100 Standard
                  87 VMAX cans
                  Cheap Japanese Tires
                  Cobalt Blue Rattle Can Paint
                  Custom Lighting on a Budget

                  Perry Center Fire Department
                  Perry Emergency Ambulance

                  "If we don't do it, who will?"


                  Some people have one of those days, I have one of those lives...

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Did you bite the V-twin off first?
                    '81 XS1100 SH

                    Melted to the ground during The Valley Fire

                    Sep. 12th 2015

                    RIP

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      LOL...nope, no biting here. I fired my XS up last December sitting out in the driveway, so I could drive it up on my porch into it's place in my haphazard plastic shack. At the time it had no baffles, just straight-thru pipes. My neighbor came out and asked me to turn it to face the other way because I was literally knocking things off the shelves inside his house. At the time he came out, it was only running on two cylinders...LOL...
                      "Rat Rod"
                      79 XS1100 Standard
                      87 VMAX cans
                      Cheap Japanese Tires
                      Cobalt Blue Rattle Can Paint
                      Custom Lighting on a Budget

                      Perry Center Fire Department
                      Perry Emergency Ambulance

                      "If we don't do it, who will?"


                      Some people have one of those days, I have one of those lives...

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Our local police department has Hummer all painted up with the DARE logos and such. I thought.. "what a waste" until I read the back window...



                        New Hummer $60,000
                        Top End Stereo System $4,500
                        Alloy Aftermarket Rims $6,000
                        Engine Mods $2,000

                        Taking all this from a drug dealer... Priceless!
                        Try your hardest to be the kind of person your dog thinks you are.

                        You can live to be 100, as long as you give up everything that would make you want to live to be 100!

                        Current bikes:
                        '06 Suzuki DR650
                        *'82 XJ1100 with the 1179 kit. "Mad Maxim"
                        '82 XJ1100 Completely stock fixer-upper
                        '82 XJ1100 Bagger fixer-upper
                        '82 XJ1100 Motor/frame and lots of boxes of parts
                        '82 XJ1100 Parts bike
                        '81 XS1100 Special
                        '81 YZ250
                        '80 XS850 Special
                        '80 XR100
                        *Crashed/Totalled, still own

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by trbig
                          Our local police department has Hummer all painted up with the DARE logos and such. I thought.. "what a waste" until I read the back window...



                          New Hummer $60,000
                          Top End Stereo System $4,500
                          Alloy Aftermarket Rims $6,000
                          Engine Mods $2,000

                          Taking all this from a drug dealer... Priceless!
                          I rode my boss's Harley a few times down in Florida. Vibration, noise, worrying about making it back. At least the weather was great!

                          This new 38' Cigarette Top Gun with twin 575 engines, kevlar hull, was kindly "donated" to our agency in FL by a local smuggler. We put it right into service.

                          currently own;
                          1980 Yamaha XS1100 SG
                          2009 Yamaha Star Raider

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Balancing the budget

                            If the narcotics industry makes enough profit that it's workers can afford to buy Hummers & Cigarette boats despite the trade's illegality, What an opportunity the Government is wasting. Sell all that stuff in Government licensed stores alongside the booze & tobacco and there'd be so much money available to the Government that it could not only afford the to pay for the war in Iraq out of current income, they could afford to buy the place and bring the troops home.
                            Fred Hill, S'toon
                            XS11SG with Spirit of America sidecar
                            "The Flying Pumpkin"

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              If the narcotics industry makes enough profit that it's workers can afford to buy Hummers & Cigarette boats despite the trade's illegality, What an opportunity the Government is wasting. Sell all that stuff in Government licensed stores alongside the booze & tobacco and there'd be so much money available to the Government that it could not only afford the to pay for the war in Iraq out of current income, they could afford to buy the place and bring the troops home.
                              I agree with this 100%
                              1980 XS Eleven Special

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