A little enlightenment into the mind of a woman...

[Wildkat]

Ohhhh Tod, that post was wrong on SO many levels

Goin' for hubby of the year award... can ya tell?

At rocket speed... but you might want to turn it around as it is headed in the wrong direction.

Women..... no sense of humor!

~pout... sniff~

That hurt my feelings.

[MAXIMAN]

Re: Potty mouth

Originally posted by Wildkat
While I understand that it is easier for us to put it down than it is to raise it... it just looks better when it is down (cleaner too)IMHO.... and no... warm flesh, cold porcelain and toilet water were never meant to be together...
~shudder~

Boy now I understand why you gals get all bent out of shape about the seat being up.

A couple months ago about 2 am I got the urge. Jumped up out of bed and into the "throne room"...pitch black dark. I just sat down not realizing the seat was up...

DISGUSTING! The cold porcelain directly on my warm bottom and I almost fell in to boot!

Now I put it down everytime I finish.

[trbig]

Cody, Cody, Cody...

Please tell me that your call of nature was due to a uhhh... #2 in nature! NO MAN... especially one of recent GURU status would EVER admit to actually sitting to pee! Even though at 2am it's much easier and is often done (Lots easier than cleaning up after bad aim) NEVER EVER ADMIT THAT!
If you say you're secure enough in your manhood to do this... then prove it. Next time we meet, you must have a pink bike and riding leathers with imprints of daisies on the knees and elbows! lol. And don't forget the tassles!! LMAO.. We'll even let you lead.... WAAAYYYY ahead! (Certainly wouldn't want you "Bringin' up the rear!") Thank you, thank you... I'll be here all night!

If it WAS due to the other call of nature..... What's up Bro... how bout them Cowboys?!? lol.

Tod

P.S. Did you notice the bed shaking when you returned... SWMBO trying to hide the snickering!?

[Dragonrider]

Originally posted by trbig

If you say you're secure enough in your manhood to do this... then prove it. Next time we meet, you must have a pink bike and riding leathers with imprints of daisies on the knees and elbows! lol. And don't forget the tassles!!

I dunno...I ran into a guy in a bar in Austin once...probably 6'9" and 400-425 pounds of friggen big bulging muscle...black guy...and he made Micheal Clark Duncan look like a featherweight.

He was dressed head to toe in hot pink leathers. I didn't know that it was even possible to make leather that color...boots, pants, jacket, gloves, hat...all leather and all flaming hot pink.

The pink t-shirt he was wearing under the jacket said in black letters, "Go ahead, ask me if I'm gay"

I think he was comfortable in his manhood...and I didn't ask...and did say "sir" when we conversed.

I suspect the hot pink Harley in the parking lot complete with beads and pink tassles...was probably his....

Anyway... on the subject of toilet seats...my sisters always had a pragmatic outlook on the subject...as in "Better he leaves it up than he never raises it in the first place...." Eeeewww.

(I do put it ... and the lid...down...it's habit...and keeps the pets out....)

[trbig]

The pink t-shirt he was wearing under the jacket said in black letters, "Go ahead, ask me if I'm gay"

See... that's one of my downfalls... I would have had to ask! LOL. He may have whipped me in the end... but I can guarantee he wouldn't have felt like doing anything else if he HAD been! lol. I've always had a really hard time not abliging people that were out BEGGING for a fight! lol. I don't go looking for them... but if someone dressed like that was to approach me, I would be polite and say something to the effect of "Ya know.. if you are gay or not is your business, but I would like to ask whether you prefer "Sir or M'am" when I address you. Aint it amazing I still have all my own teeth?? lol.

Tod

[Wildkat]

You know MAXIMAN

I don't recall seeing anyone get picked on upon attaining Guru status as much as you have. You are SO incredibly lucky!

"Better he leaves it up than he never raises it in the first place...." Eeeewww.

I absolutely agree... after doing some work for a couple of bachelors, I needed to utilize the facilities... Being bachelors... they apparently decided they NEVER needed to raise the seat... and I decided to wait until I got home.

Ummmm... EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Pink leather? I would have probably asked him... sometimes we females can get away with those things.
(besides... his t-shirt said it was okay)

[Special Ed]

Battle of the sexes

Good one Wildkat. I used to mark "that time of the month" ahead of time on the calendar with a little "female" symbol with a pair of horns on top. One day SWMBO spotted it and asked me what it was for. I just smiled sheepishly. After a few beats (as we say in the theater,) she cracked up. I'm glad she thought it was "cute!"

I'm as likely to change the toilet roll as anyone, but riddle me this riddle: does the loose end hang down the front or the back, and why?

I have about 4 toiletry items: comb, hair trimming scissors, razor and shaving cream. Its not so bad now, but before the daughter left for college, I could hardly find them for all the shampoo, conditioner, body wash, facial cream, etc., takeing up all the shelf space.

Life would be so dull without the other sex to complain about!

[MAXIMAN]

Re: Battle of the sexes

Originally posted by E.Liberty
I'm as likely to change the toilet roll as anyone, but riddle me this riddle: does the loose end hang down the front or the back, and why?

Funny you mentioned this. I can't answer the riddle but I can report a few years ago I was reading an article about divorce. The typical reasons were easy to guess. But the survey published some of the strange reasons.

One of the strange reasons was "The toilet paper being rolled wrong!" Seriously...2 or 3 of the 1,000 respondents in this divorce poll stated the straw that broke the camels back was their inability to agree on paper forward or paper back!

[trbig]

Well let's just settle this right now then! lol. Paper rolls off the FRONT!! And if old military habits compell you... underfold the front square in a 45 degree angle and "Flag" it. Now if I could just figure out how to get those "Hospital corners" and quarter bouncing tightness on a waterbed!

I do like to get up screaming at the kids though... "GET UP YOU MAGGOTS!!!!!" Always starts the day off with a smile! lol.

Tod

[trbig]

Hee hee... forgot to mention... Goin for DAD of the year award too!

Tod

[Special Ed]

Squat to pee?

Sailors do, you know. Saves having to clean up around the head.
E.Liberty

[prometheus578]

Who's head?
Is this another Naval hazing ritual?

[Pat Kelly]

From a medical standpoint it is better to sit and pee, less stress on the bladder.
Occasionally writing your name in the snow is probably ok.

[LoserShoes]

When a kitten is in the house, hang it with the paper in back, then it doesn't unroll all over the floor when the kitten discovers a new cat toy in the bathroom.

Steve

[Wildkat]

When a kitten is in the house, hang it with the paper in back, then it doesn't unroll all over the floor when the kitten discovers a new cat toy in the bathroom.

Unless you have 2 kittens... in which case, it doesn't matter which way you hang it... trust me...

From a medical standpoint it is better to sit and pee, less stress on the bladder.

This is good to know... I'll make sure I stay seated

Occasionally writing your name in the snow is probably ok.

Wish I could do this... but you can't read my writing.

(Okay... I think I'm finished being crude. I haven't let myself get to this level since I was bartending.)

I used to mark "that time of the month" ahead of time on the calendar with a little "female" symbol with a pair of horns on top.

Now THAT is good!
Poor John... I'm not that predictable... always hits when he least expects it. (bwa- ha-ha-ha-ha)