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A little fun in honor of the TeXSive Rally

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  • A little fun in honor of the TeXSive Rally

    WINDOWS 2000 TEXAS VERSION

    Dear Consumers:

    It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 2000 TEXAS EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside of the state of Texas. If you have one of these, you may need some help understanding the commands.

    The TEXAS EDITION may be recognized by the unique opening screen. It reads: WINDERS 2000, with a background picture of Willie Nelson superimposed on the Alamo.

    Please also note:
    The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
    My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
    Dial Up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
    Control Panel is known as "The Dashboard"
    Hard Drive is referred to as "4-Wheel Drive"
    Floppies are "Them little ol' plastic thangs"
    Instead of an error message, "Duct tape" pops up

    CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN TEXAS EDITION:
    Cancel............stopdat
    Reset..............try'er agin
    Yes..................yep
    No...................nope
    Find.................hunt fer it
    Go to...............over yonder
    Back................back yonder
    Help.................hep me out here
    Stop..................kwitit
    Start.................crank'er up
    Settings............settins
    Programs..........stuff at duz stuff
    Documents.......stuff ah done did

    Also note that theTEXAS EDITION does not
    recognize capital letters or punctuation marks.
    Some programs that are exclusive to Winders 2000:
    Tiperiter.....................a word processing program
    Colerin' Book.............a graphics program
    Cyferin' mersheen.....calculator
    Outhouse paper.........notepad
    Inner-net....................Microsoft Explorer 5.0
    Pitchers......................a graphics viewer

    We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received copy of the TEXAS EDITION.
    You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

    Billy Bob Gates
    [b][size=4][font=times][color=#BD0062]Wayne[/color][/font][/size][/b]
    [b][size=4][font=times][color=#095de5]TeXSive forever[/color][/font][/size][/b]
    The best alarm clock is sunshine on chrome.
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